What really I want .....

I want to know what will make me happy .... a cup of tea,aloo parantha, rain outside,my hometown,good song coming in radio.Yes these sounds tempting ,especially at this phase when things are tight for me .When I want to go shopping,feel the rain ,keep sleeping during my weekends ..but have no rest on weekends ,its all class,its paper ,its maths,VA and DI ...
So i have thgt to make this subject little intersting.

Let me now dnt work but make this task intersting.Make my lessons exciting,take challenge to keep up the work . Nowadays I have started working...but I stop whenever I feel restless and my problem is that I am always restless..So here is that I have to improve...

So to make them exciting, first of all I have to enjoy them and change my mind frame...
So here I stand again to enjoy the journey so that i can enjoy the end.

My challenge will be to complete my task first and keep raising the mark of my performance.
And this is for a year only and I want to enjoy this phase...my enjoyment phase ....

I have to shun my sleep and work little harder for a year and i can enjoy all these things .Also my tea,my sleep can be a gift for me ...and I will make sure I gift myself after a week ...Nowadays I keep showering the gift to myself in a duration of 2 days . So my next showering will nt be till I reach Yashika's place.

Attitude Change...

One thing I need to do now is to change my attitude...
Office work is also my priority. I will make sure I change my attitude a little .....:)

Feeling low....:(

Today I am feeling so low , I had a little discussion with person but it was a fair discussion I dnt know why the ohter person spoiled her mood....I went and talk to her but there are negative vibes coming...ufff ....................Sorry to say but i will say I am not enjoying the day ....I want to enjoy,be happy ,make my life better...and I know all these things are in my mind only which is hampering my thoughts...

So ,let me be happy now.Let me try to forget whats bad and worst,there are so many other things that I have to follow......I will follow it properly .....

You know I am such a girl ,who never used to take any person seriosuly,no matter how derogatory comments ppl used to say ..Now I think I have started taking ppl seriously and those ppl who really make my days worse...

They have an opnion abt me for everything,you cut your hair short,you acheived so less in CAT,we consider you as duffer and you shop from sarojini,lajpat ..yuk ...we wont ever go there ..my nephew went wid me and he wanted to leave that place immedialty and so many yuk yuk about my choice and the best part is that i have received compliments over the top I chose from sarojini...:) is it an irony ....

Anyways ,they think me as such a duffer person and on the other hand considers themselves as super intelligent,they have opinion abt everything,love to flaunt there gold and diamond jwellery and wants us to give them a compliment for even a bangle (gold ) which they are wearing ...i hardly notice such things....there are so many other things.....

Hey ,is this going to be any good for me....Will it help me anywhere ...What are my dreams ,will I am going to acheive them ,yes i know that i luv to experiment on me ...luv to wear good clothes and try differently...i have tried clips and broad hairbands in office...

And i think I can judge myself better then any one else ,I fetch compliments for what i try and i think dis much is enuf to get confidence and even if nodoby gives me any compliment I shud be less shatered...

I love being dress up on my own ....Ok so here I write about some positive things abt myself and why I shud keep on fighthing and not spoil my mood...

1) I am working so hard ,each day i come home and study ,dnt watch movies on weekends but go to class on stautrday and sunday ....and den cum back and study ..
I have got no holidays ..How many ppl do ever have such guts to work for their dreams ...I am earning so good that i hardly have to burn myself like this but I do ...bcoz i want something better..

2) I inspire ppl who work hard ,pray from them sincerely and try to help them....in my case i see ppl making fun of my failure knowingly or unknowingly.....hum nein toe bina paree CAT diya tha aur hum 80+ layeee..this was on the day I got CAT result...

3)I give sincere compliments to ppl and aprreciate everyone..Yes i dnt overrate or underrate anyone..for me everyone can do any job ,i jus ask ppl to stop giving their views...

4)I am considerate...I never ask for favours ....I make sure that i dnt hurt anyone or ppl dnt have to work even extra for me....

5)I call my parents often and I want them to have a very good life....I will make sure that they get their best...

6) I am sincere in my realtionship ....I trust ppl and rely on their words....

May be results are not so good this time but now i will make sure that I learn from my mistakes ...

I will enjoy this journey and right now I have three aims in my mind and I will make sure i acheive it on time........:)

How is it going???

These days are quite boring in office...we dnt have much work .....our managers are gone to France(anyways I was never afraid of them )....but I keep on mugging words,reading a novel and preparing...I dnt know how far it may go or will it be last year ..a merely 60 %ile...Anyways I am not thinking about this now.It s not that I am too confident to crack and go in IIMs ...it that these things of failure haven't occured in my mind..I know these are going to come one day ....

But Now I wil give it a full shot..I am going to motivate myself ,keep looking for good scores in Test Series...I will note down what all things are required and I will make sure that I will daily follow these...no matter wat happens ,no matter how low I feel ,I will continue to work hard in a logical way and I think this is more important to work in logical way and I will make my mind to study .I will enjoy the process ,every process......:)

My Asset...:)

My hardwork is my asset.Yes there are other things also which help me keep going.My positive attitude ..However even if my attitude fails as it has done in the last few days ,atleast I have my hardwork with me.So ,here again this is a testing time where I have to prove myself.And let me enjoy this journey ..a journey full of sweat ,hardwork,no enjoyement after office,studying late night,getting early in the morning,shunning all entertainment...I believe it is more enjoyable than sleeping without a goal ..its hte time when more than a few hour sleep results in guilt....Its not that last time I didnt do all these things,I had worked hard but there was depression..there was no hope,no result ,every other exam was more patheic than the previous one...

I am nt deny the fact that the same can happen at this moment also .But let it happen,all I think now is of a target ...A target which is going to become true and i will bask under its golory...
I know I have to work more harder ,complete all assingments and prepare for the day ...

So here I go and yes this time I will enjoy the journey ...... :)

Emotions

I am running with emotions of different kind....However I have to composed myself and work towards my goal .Yes there will be talks about my engagement and marriage but I will work hard more during that days ...So ,here I have decided to work with all my potential to th emost important zeal of my life.I vow to rise above the medicore level .I vow to strive for the best and I vow that I am going to enjoy my journey to the end.

So ,from today onwards i wont overlook things. I will be more discplined. I will folow my timetable and no matter what happens I m not going to crib . I am going to work hard and hardest. I shine when I am hardest hit and will remember that it takes an attitude to get out of a situation and I am going to make sure that I really get out of it.

Changes

Hey I have to change few things about myself...and that is my EQ factor...i am too emotional ...emotional to a dearth...i can carry over things..even when i have to present my point of view I am turning emotional ....emotional and emotional ...when I try to expalin something I again become emotional ...anyone can feel it from my voice...I am going to change this thing...Yes I have one more ething to work about.....:)

A tinge of excitment...

I am going pretty ok thi stime..I dnt feel like I am missing the journey of CAT...
I am putting efforts from my side.But yes ,a definite plan is still that I have to make ...
Things are falling in place but I now need to do it with 100% dedication till JULY..and yes I am going to do .Today I am going ot prepare a plan for weekend and then I will make sure that I acheive it ...Ok let me break it into smaller parts ...so lets plan till JULY and no matter what happens I will be quite strict myself during that phase...
Also ,I will make sure that I remain on diet during this phase (expect pokhi's time )and excercise everyday ...especially tummy :) ...and yes I will take time to read the newspaper everyday....:)so done raha JULY tak ..